WAYS OF GETTING THE MOST FROM YOUR GROUP EXPERIENCE:

 

 

1. Recognize that trust is not something that ‘just happens’ in a group but that you have a role in creating it. If you are aware of anything getting in the way of a climate of safety, share your hesitation with the group.

 

1. Commit yourself to getting something from your group by focusing on your personal goals. Before each meeting, make the time to think about how you can get involved, what personal concerns you want to explore, and other ways to use the time in the group meaningfully.

 

1. Rather than waiting to be called on, attempt to bring yourself into the interactions at the beginning of each session by letting others know what you want from this particular meeting. Although it is useful to have a tentative agenda of what your would like to discuss, don’t cling inflexibly to your agenda if other issues surface spontaneously within the group. Be open to pursuing alternative paths if you are affected by what others are exploring.

 

1. An important part of group process is expressing how you are being impacted by other group members. If you are able to identify with the experience of others, it generally helps both you and them to share your feelings and thoughts.

 

1. Decide for yourself what, how much, and when you will disclose personal facets of yourself. Others will not have a basis for knowing you unless you tell them about yourself. If you have difficulty in sharing yourself personally in the group, begin by letting others know that you are experiencing difficulty disclosing and, if you are able, what makes it hard for you to self-disclose.

 

1. Don’t confuse self-disclosure with story-telling. Try to avoid getting lost and overwhelming others with lots of information about you or your history. Instead, express what is on your mind and on your heart presently. Reveal your current life-experiences and what is significant to you at this time in your life, especially as it relates to what others are experiencing.

 

1. Express feelings, thoughts, reactions that relate to what is emerging in the group in the here and now. If these thoughts, feelings are recurring than it is likely they are significant so feel free to express.

 

1. Practice your attending and listening skills. If you can give others the gift of your presence and understanding, you are contributing a great deal to the group process.

 

1. Use the group to experiment with new behaviours. Allow yourself to try out different ways to of being to determine how you may want to change. Discover how to extend new ways of thinking, feeling and acting into your outside life.  

 

1. Give yourself your own homework assignments and let the group know how you are doing.

 

1. Attempt to make personal and direct statements to others in the group that are grounded in your own experience. Try not to give advice or make intellectual interpretations about other group members. Speak for yourself and about yourself.

 

1. In giving feedback to others avoid making judgements about them ie. labeling or categorizing them. Tell them what you are observing and how their specific behaviours are affecting you.

 

1. Provide support for others by expressing your care for them yet be aware of tendencies to ‘rescue’ or re-assure people. Too much of these behaviours may hinder group members from taking the space to express what they need to.

 

1. Respect yourself, your limits and practice self-care at all times. Some group sessions you may be more vocal than others. Realize that you have changing needs and respect these.

 

1. Be aware that some group sessions may provoke you. Be aware of this possibility and try to gain some learning from the experience. As always, use the group as support.

 

1. Take responsibility for what you are accomplishing in the group. Spend some time thinking about what is taking place at these meetings and evaluating the degree to which you are attaining your goals. If you are not satisfied with your group experience vocalize this and/or look at what you can do to make the group a more meaningful experience for you.

 

1. Be aware of respecting and maintaining the confidentiality of what goes on inside your group. Be aware of how easy it is to breach confidentiality, unawares, in inappropriate talk to others not in the group.  

 

1. Be prepared if your friends and loved ones don’t understand, accept or support you as you change. Some people may find some of your new behaviours/attitudes challenging. Take care of yourself and be open to using the group as a form of support.

 

1. Keeping a personal journal to record impressions of your explorations and learning in the group can be useful.  A journal offers a further tool of self-exploration where further clarification, of group insights, can occur.

 

1. And…above all, be aware of the pleasure that arises through a more authentic contact with others.